• Talking about having children right after a cancer diagnosis may feel uncomfortable.
  • If you and your partner have already talked about having kids, it can be helpful to refer back to that conversation.
    • “I know we’ve discussed having children, and this cancer diagnosis may be disrupting our plans. I wanted to talk to you about sperm banking, as it could provide us with future options.”
    • Explain that fertility preservation is like an insurance policy—you may never need it, but it gives you the option to have a child in the future if your sperm is negatively affected by cancer treatment.
    • The conversation can provide both of you hope as you think about what happens after fertility treatment. It's also important to discuss what will happen to your sperm if you pass away.
  • Ultimately, remember that it’s your choice whether to tell your partner about sperm banking, just as it’s your decision to do so.
  • Although these conversations may seem difficult to have now, you may find that talking about the future provides hope for you in this stressful process.
    • Talking about it now can also prevent future conversations starting with: 'Why didn’t you tell me?” For example, if you don’t tell your partner that you have banked your sperm, your partner may automatically assume that kids are out of the picture. This could create problems in the future when you bring up the idea of having kids as your partner has already ruled this out as a possibility. By telling your partner, you help keep your partner in the loop. This is especially important if your partner will have to undergo fertility treatment and/or if you’ll have to enlist the help of a surrogate in order to conceive, as these treatments can be costly, invasive and time intensive.
  • These conversations can be uncomfortable. You can always consult a couples’ counselor if you’d like guidance on these topics.